Happy Halloween! As far as Cort is concerned, it’s the most wonderful time of the year. Not that she doesn’t watch horror films all… year… long!

For Halloween this year, our assignment was “Wes Craven’s New Nightmare,” “Scream,” and “The Witches of Eastwick” (all on HBO Max). (Can you tell that HBO Max is our favorite?!) For extra credit we watched “The Fog” (AMZ Prime—the original, not that bullshit remake), “Firestarter” (HBO Max), “Gothika” (HBO Max), “Hellraiser” (tubi and Pluto), and “Halloween Kills” (theater and Peacock).

For a truly meta experience, you can’t beat “Wes Craven’s New Nightmare.” Starring Heather Langenkamp as Heather Langenkamp, the premise of this movie is that Freddy Krueger has come back from the dead into the “real world”—brought back through Wes Craven’s writing a new script. Yes, Wes is in the movie, as is Robert Englund, the original Freddy himself. Also back is John Saxon as John Saxon, the actor who played Lt. Thompson/Nancy’s dad in the original “Nightmare on Elm Street.” (Saxon died in 2020 at age 83. #f**k2020.)

Another unbeatable horror film is “Scream”—the film that laid out the horror flick rules. According to Randy (and he’s totally correct), “You push the laws, and you end up dead.” Of course, Sidney (Neve Campbell) breaks the #1 rule (don’t have sex), and she still ends up as “The Final Girl.” Well, Gale Weathers (Courtney Cox) is there, too. But she is allowed to have sex (not that she did in the film, as far as we know) since she is a full-fledged adult.

Speaking of sex, what is up with Alex (Cher), Jane (Susan Sarandon), and Sukie (Michelle Pfeiffer) being so attracted to Daryl Van Horne (Jack Nicholson) in “The Witches of Eastwick”?! “You’re not even interesting enough to make me sick,” Alex says to him… right before she sleeps with him. What??!! This one isn’t a horror or a slasher. Not scary either. Gross in parts (projectile-barfing grape seeds!). Creepy (especially Daryl/Jack). It’s great to see these women together—and eventually kick some devil ass.

Next week our theme is “Musicians who Movie.” Watch the following movies, and listen to the music of your choice. Macy Gray, Dr. Dre, and Snoop Dogg in “Training Day” (HBO Max); Jennifer Lopez in “Out of Sight” (Peacock); and Justin Timberlake in “Palmer” (Apple TV+). 

Now, one required song is Lonely Planet’s “Jizz in My Pants” on YouTube. It features Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg. Fine. You can pick “Dick in a Box” if you must. But “Jizz in My Pants” is better than a “Dick in a Box.” (That’s what he said.)

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Follow Cort’s podcast with Brad at PureFandom.com

Check out Susan’s movie stats on Letterboxd https://letterboxd.com/barbisu/stats/

Original music by Garrett Thompson

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