This week on Geek Girl Soup, we watch a selection of three traditional Christmas movies, a Christmas horror flick, and three new entries to our holiday repertoire: “Die Hard,” “Die Hard 2,” “Elf,” “Dead End,” “8-Bit Christmas,” “Hot Mess Holiday,” and “A Naija Christmas.”

Y’all all know by now that “Die Hard” and “Die Hard 2” (both on Peacock) are most definitely Christmas movies. One, because we said so. Two, because director John McTiernan and writer Steven De Souza said so. If you need nine more reasons why, read this article from The Conversation. “Ho, ho, ho. Now I have a machine gun.” “Yippee ki yay, motherf**ker.”

Did you know that a couple of the producers of “Elf” (Apple TV+) had to struggle to get approval for Jon Favreau to direct and for Will Farrell to play Buddy?! Watch “The Movies that Made Us” s3 e8: “Elf” (Netflix) for more factoids about the making of one of the best Christmas movies ever. I mean, have you ever seen a more perfect, joyful (literally full of joy) Christmas movie? “Santa!!! Oh, my God! I know him! I know him!” “Smiling’s my favorite!” “Congratulations! You did it! The world’s best cup of coffee!”

“Dead End” (IMDb TV/AMZ Prime) is a Christmas horror film made by two French directors, though the film is in English. The movie stars Ray Wise as the dad driving his wife, teenage son (or immature college student), daughter in her early 20s, and daughter’s fiancé to visit his wife’s mother for Christmas. They’re driving at night. And dad decides to leave the highway to take a back road through a forest. On this seemingly endless road, they stop to help a young hippy-ish women dressed in white, holding a swaddled baby. No spoilers, but this ain’t called “Dead End” for nothing. We really enjoyed it. 

Susan watched “8-Bit Christmas” (HBO Max). She says it’s sweet, nostalgic Christmas fare. But she had a hard time getting over the historical inaccuracies. For example, those of us who were sentient beings in the 1980s know that Cabbage Patch Kids were a big thing in 1983, not 1988 when the movie takes place. You could totally get your hands on a Cabbage Patch Kid for Christmas in 1988. But who would want one by then? If you’re not the type to get stuck on little details, then this is a cute one to add to your list.

Cort watched “Hot Mess Holiday” (Comedy Central). This is a fun comedy about a young finance executive who gets dumped by her cheating fiancé. Her best friend comes to the rescue to help her have fun during the Diwali holiday. Not a Christmas movie. And Diwali already passed this year. But it’s a lovely film that gives a look into a non-Christian-based holiday. We wish that this film had been out a year ago when we were on the hunt for a Diwali movie and ended up watching a 3-hour-long movie that mentioned Diwali in one song. Yeah, not about Diwali at all.

Cort also watched “A Naija Christmas” (Netflix), an English-language Nollywood movie—Nigerian film. A mother is assessing potential wives for her three sons. The mom can be quite acerbically funny. This one would have been good for last week’s theme of “International Christmas Extravaganza.” Well, it can become a “traditional” Christmas movie soon enough!

Merry Christmas, y’all!

We also mention “Fauci,” “In the Same Breath,” “King Richard,” “Swan Song,” “North Hollywood,” “South Park: Post Covid,” “Invasion,” “Succession,” “Station Eleven” (go watch it now!), “Abbott Elementary,” and “Spider-Man: No Way Home.”

Next week, we’re going back to The Matrix with all four films—all on HBO Max or in a theater near you. So, put on your mask, buy a buffer seat (seriously—we do), take that red pill, and join us next week as we discuss the latest from the fabulous Lana Wachowski.

Follow Cort’s podcast with Brad at PureFandom.com

Check out Susan’s movie stats on Letterboxd https://letterboxd.com/barbisu/stats/

Listen to Kelly’s podcast at Brand + Design Scoop

Original music by Garrett Thompson

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